Moments of Insecurity

Just because I embodied my Soul, am psychic, can channel & more, doesn't mean I don't have my own rough times or emotions to work through. I still have feelings of loneliness even though I'm "connected". For those who are in the process of Soul embodiment, it doesn't have to be a painful process, but it can mean facing some tough emotions. Often it's about letting go. I have a tendency to hold things in. One of the things I have found helpful in this process is going into my dark closet, sitting on the floor and just letting it out. Crying, talking myself through it, admitting to those thoughts that are causing me pain, grief, etc. We need to be able to release it. I go in a closet because it's a place where I feel like I can just say whatever. Of course, I'll get feedback from my Soul so that may be different. It's a good thing to remember though.

This morning, it was a conflict I was having in my mind about how I "think" I look in my body compared to certain female celebrities. A very common "not good enough" emotion I have grappled with most of my adult life. Since I'm in the process of a divorce and facing the reality of single life at some point, old insecurities popped up. I already have the tools to change the mindset, and just when I think I have it licked, something happens to trigger it again.

So while I'm healthier than I have been in decades, I know that society still holds females especially to unrealistic standards. It's getting better. Putting myself out there in the public eye (although in a small way for now), can intensify those feelings every so often. The whole idea of first impressions. My own feeling is that the content is what matters. My heart, my mind, my Soul and the ability to bring through the beauty and guidance for others shines through in my mind most often, but it sucks when I do have those moments of doubt, insecurity, etc. And with that realization of those moments, creates an added pressure of "Of course we know this is not how to be anymore, so how come I'm still dealing with it?!" kind of scenario.

This is where loving ourselves fiercely would come in. However, this morning, for me, it was a flashback to some guidance I received in a session the day before yesterday. Something to look forward to. Another way to bring out my creativity which is what excites me now, especially as life is pretty restrictive from my typical activities pre-Covid.

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